The joy of describing wine can be one of the most fun jobs I have yet a very daunting tasks for others. We hear so often in our restaurant, "I prefer the driest wine you have." While this may sound cool or sophisticated, it tells me nothing about the style of wine one enjoys. Most table wines poured by the glass in restaurants contain no residual sugar whatsoever, so the majority of the wines are, in fact, dry, if dry means having no sugar. Think hard about what you mean when you tell someone you would like the driest wine on the menu. Do you mean the wine with the least amount of fruit flavors? In that case, you would probably drink an earth-driven Bordeaux or a rustic Barolo or a crisp Sauvignon Blanc. If those are the wines you prefer, then use descriptors like earthy, rustic or crisp. It tells the person selecting your wine, whether it a salesperson, a server or your dinner host, much more about what styles of wine you enjoy.

If dry means something else, and believe me, dry means something different to all people, then try to determine what you like in a wine. Are you fond of oak flavors like vanilla, toast or butter? Or do you like fruit-forward wines that have flavors of jam and berries? When you taste wine, what do you taste? There are no wrong answers. Wine is subjective, and it is important to realize that if you taste something in a wine like bell pepper or minerals or Vaseline, then someone else probably does as well.

A common question often asked is why do we use grapes to make wine as opposed to other types of fruit. The reason is grapes have more aromatic compounds, or smells, than any other fruit. This is why wine is so magical. You make a beverage out of grapes, and the outcome has aromas of green grass, tar, roses, black pepper, and the list continues.

One of the funniest descriptors I ever heard was when someone described a wine as being similar to a Chippendale dancer: sweaty, leathery and hot. For those who may not be familiar with these wine terms, let me break it down for you: sweaty refers to the aroma of body odor that can come from older barrels; leathery refers to the rawhide smell that comes from certain grapes; and hot refers to the high level of alcohol.

Of course, this is a quirky description, and the wine steward may give you a wary glance if that is what you say when telling her what type of wine you like. Regardless, have fun when you talk about wine. Don't be discouraged or intimidated if someone gives you a blank stare when you say you like wines that taste like bananas and bubble gum. It's their loss if they don't understand. Next time you taste wine, taste it again and again until you have two fruit flavors and one non-fruit aroma. Not only is it fun, but it helps your wine salesperson know what you like and what you don't like—it's a win-win situation for all involved.